…the thing I didn’t mention about yesterday’s charity do was that I nearly broke the habit of a lifetime and tried to chat up someone I’d only just met.

This is not my usual style. I brood, aloof, and wait.

But one of the stand-up performers did a routine best described as “mimed comedic burlesque”. That doesn’t really do it justice, but it reminded me of cabaret performers in the pubs of the East End of London, or a camped up middle aged female variation thereof.

She was quirky, funny, interesting, clearly a bit barking. The kind of woman it would be easy to adore. Having had a few beers I was sorely tempted to switch into my outrageous mode. She knew I’d been tickled by her performance as I couldn’t help grinning at her.

All this was cut short when she slipped her husband into conversation, who then duly trundled around the corner like a motley gooseberry. Blast and damnation. I mentally re-adjusted, adopting male resignation at having been beaten to it. But, oh, the unrequited frisson.


3 thoughts on “Outrageous

  1. Husbands/wives – motley gooseberries all of them. Don’t you just hate it when someone starts showing you pictures of their children, their dog, their cat and, in case you still haven’t got the message, their patio, their driveway, their vintage motorbike…

    Liked by 2 people

    • Ha! I actually prefer the blunt route, it saves on making a tit of yourself. Couple of months ago I saw it done to perfection; some (other) guy starts making overtures outside at a poetry gig before she slammed in the reference to her boyfriend inside somewhere in his second sentence. Honestly, that’s better. I’m quite capable of a rueful smile.

      Liked by 1 person

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